


The Darker Side of Curiosity

by EtherealOmega



Category: Durarara!!
Genre: Curiosity, Dissapointment, Loss, One Time Self Harm, Self-Harm
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-02
Updated: 2017-02-02
Packaged: 2018-09-21 16:14:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 835
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9556775
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/EtherealOmega/pseuds/EtherealOmega
Summary: A week ago Shizou met an untimely end, and now Izaya is finding that life is more boring without having to continually watch his back. His infinite boredom must be ended somehow, and in the end it's his curiosity that does it leading him to something most would call drastic.





	

**Author's Note:**

> This does have mentions of self-harm in it so you've been warned. It is a one time and one action thing caused by curiosity and not described in the greatest of details, but it's better for you to be warned ahead of time. Enjoy.

Some things never change. Even at the age of thirty-six, the information broker is still spinning in his chair like a child. However, this evening there are no outstretched arms accompanied by laughter. There are only crossed arms and a somber silence which blankets his entire flat. A few weeks have passed since since Heiwajima Shizuo's untimely demise, and each return to Ikebukuro has progressively seemed more futile than the last. The streets have been far too silent, and Izaya's pulse hasn't spiked once. The city has lost the excitement which once drew him there religiously.

The dark haired man sighs and sets his foot upon the floor again to cease his rotations. This must be what missing something is like. He muses to himself before pushing himself up out of the chair. Turnings towards his wall of windows, the man's burgundy eyes narrowed. Over the years of playing with suicides, he'd heard countless times that the world loses its color. He never believed them, and he still doesn't. However, the world did seem duller now, less exhilarating. Pathetic, he mentally scoffs. That's what you turned out to be, Shizuo... Taken down by mere humans. He scowls stalking off towards his bathroom.

Neatly folding his clothes upon the toilet lid, he places his favored switchblade on top then steps into the shower. "But Shizuo isn't the only pathetic one is he?" Izaya speaks to himself; unknowingly slipping back into a bad habit of his youth. Catching himself, he proceeds his commentary silently, you came to rely so heavily on the rush that nothing else is cutting it anymore. You've become addicted to the near-death experiences only a monster can provide. Massaging the shampoo into his scalp, the broker pushes the thoughts aside instead focusing solely on his fingertips. He lets his mind run through all his close calls, but not once does he feel that familiar thrill. With a frustrated huff Izaya tilts his head back under the heated water, and it was then that the words of a certain young woman came back to him.

She had been one of his first dozen suicide experiments, and her scarred body had proven to be the perfect clue that she would be his first successful one. She had been, but she had also left him with a mystery which to this day he hadn't fully explored. "It relieves the tension and makes things easier for awhile, of course." She had answered his question of why with a smile only moments before slitting her wrists.

He stares down at the alabaster skin of his forearms. He contemplates the pros and cons of proceeding forward. Either way I win. He reassures himself while chewing softly at the inside of his cheek; he can feel his fingers itching for action. If it makes my interest in humanity's depravity return, then I've won over the past week of boredom in an instant; but if it does nothing, at least I'll have my question answered fully. With the dilemma settled in his head, Izaya reaches out from behind the curtain. The small weight resting in his palm is familiar, and for a brief moment the wan wonders if he really wants to get his hands dirty for something as petty as this. The answer is yes. He's willing to for a chance at satiated curiosity and a returned sense of vivacity.

He flips the blade open looking over its fine edge. It has always served him well for defense, but never has it aided in an end to curiosity. Tonight will be another first. The keen edge makes an indent across his thin forearm, and he doesn't hesitate a moment as he draws it sharply across his skin. A moment of pain... Then nothing more as burgundy orbs greet crimson drops. Drops which soon enough coalesce into thin rivers of life. How disappointing, he sighs before running the silver under steaming water. He shuts the blade with a flick of his wrist; reaching past the curtain he placed the knife back in its preordained spot. Looks like she truly was just a delusional little girl. Shrugging off the less than optimal results, he allows a soft smirk to touch his lips.

The rest of his shower is mechanical: rehearsed. There is no thought to it save the added attention to his wounded arm, and once he steps out of the shower he only bothers to dry, further disinfect, and bandage the aforementioned appendage before slinking into his bedroom. He falls back onto his bed, arms outstretches and skin bare to the cool air. A familiar grin paints his face with twisted glee as the strange eyes stare up at the ceiling. "Well then... Looks like I just need to find a replacement monster then... I can't wait to see what new games we'll play.~" His sing-song tone returns for the first time in weeks, and whatever poor creature peaks his interest next is sure to be in for many a 'treat.'

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you all enjoyed. Any sort of commentary is always appreciated so don't feel shy to leave a comment about absolutely anything. Especially since I'm just now getting back into writing this sort of stuff after a few years of nothing. So if you have critiques that's great, but if all you want to do is tell me that you liked it trust me that's the best praise any writer can ever get. It makes me feel like I should definitely keep writing in general! Kudos are also lovely.~ Hope y'all have a great day/night where ever you are, and best of luck in this game which we call life. 
> 
> Signed,  
> EO


End file.
